


The Greatest Good

by Lunas_Secret_Lover



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Albus Top, Community: grindeldore, Dumblewald, Fluff, Grindeldore, Longing, Love, M/M, Pining, Porn With Plot, Redemption, Sad Ending, Smut, Twisted love, Young Dumbledore, Young Gellert Grindelwald, Young Love, grindelwald bottom, raw emotion, tortured love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-08-31 19:33:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8590909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunas_Secret_Lover/pseuds/Lunas_Secret_Lover
Summary: "Then there was the other one.  The one that everyone will remember.  The one that damned me and redeemed me and loved me so much it destroyed me.  Albus Dumbledore."Grindelwald's regrets, loves, passions and redemption are believed to be written not long after he was caged in the prison he had built.  He outlines a deep, passionate, destructive affair with perhaps the greatest wizard of our time.





	1. Blue

Sometimes you meet someone and it feels as if you’ve been struck by lightning.  It’s happened to me twice.  The first was with a boy named Romulus Archer.  I met him at Durmstrang my third year, in an advanced transfigurations class. He was a year above me and he was beautiful in a way I didn’t know how to describe.  There was a passion that ran through him, a passion he almost seemed to sweat out his pores.   I met his eyes and I was struck; I knew it, he knew it, and there was damned near nothing I could do about it.  We fucked for a year and thought we loved each other, even as we fought explosively every other day.  Like passion always does, eventually it caused us to break apart as violently as a Supernova, ripping us both to pieces but also giving me the chance to rebuild myself into something more stable and impenetrable.  Or so I thought.

 

Then there was the other one.  The one that everyone will remember.  The one that damned me and redeemed me and loved me so much it destroyed me.  Albus Dumbledore.  A seventeen year old beautiful boy who lived next to my aunt.  He was full of an anger and resentment that seemed to boil up and overwhelm him.  I don’t think there was anything he desired more than freedom those few months I knew him.  I had never met someone so brilliant before.  Or so interesting.  We could see straight down into each others’ souls, even in the beginning.  I wanted to have all of him, and I did.  He was mine, and a part of him always will be.  But if you, dear reader, know anything about history, you’ll know that this isn’t a happy story.  There is no beautiful ending of two boys falling in love and living happily ever after.  It was pain.  It IS pain.  It was flawed.  It was the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced.  I do not write this to redeem myself, but to examine these memories for myself.  There is nothing else to do in this cell that I built, besides agonize over my life in my mind.  Albus, I hope that you someday read this.  I hope that you can one day understand exactly what you meant to me, in spite of my many flaws and destruction of everything that you held dear.  

 

The first moment I saw him still burns to the front of my mind some days.  It was summer, June, I think.  I was in the village researching the Deathly Hallows, under the pretense of staying with my aunt to regain my confidence after being thrust out of Durmstrang.  Bathilda, my great aunt, had sent me over so I could meet someone my own age to associate with in Godric’s Hallow.  When he opened the door, the world stopped spinning like something out of a witch’s bad romance novel.  We both froze in place and stared at each other.  His big blue eyes could see right through me, drinking in all of my secrets and all of my fears, as if his glasses were charmed to read my mind.  He was shorter than me, a little.  That crooked nose seemed to be the only imperfection of his face, and one imperfection seemed to somehow make him more perfect.  His smile was almost as crooked as his nose, as he flashed it to me for the first time.  

 

“Hello,” I’d finally croaked, unable to remember any other words.

 

“Hello,” he’d replied in that deep voice of his, a tone slightly older than it should have sounded.  “Are you Bathilda’s nephew?”

 

“Great nephew, actually.  Yes, I’m Gellert.  Gellert Grindelwald.”

 

“I’m Albus.  Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.”  Albus had always seemed so proud of his full name.  I would later learn that he added one of those middle names himself, giving him even more pride at its elegance and length.  I fell in love with him a little bit right there.

 

“Do you go to Hogwarts, Albus?”  Something strange and almost dark had flashed across his face at that.

 

“Not anymore.  Do you?”  I shook my head at that.  Neither of us offered an explanation, and somehow we didn’t need to.

 

“Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?” he had asked, and I remember his voice shaking, just a little, as if he was uncertain whether he wanted me to agree or not.  I did agree.  I followed that boy into his home and in that moment I would have followed him anywhere.  

 

Over tea we got to know each other.  I learned that he had a brother, and an invalid sister that he had been left taking care of, after the death of his parents.  The resentment shone through his words at this, and I remember thinking what a waste it was for someone who seemed as bright as the young Dumbledore boy to be stuck in a little village looking after a child.  He asked me about Durmstrang.

 

In the vain ignorance of my youth, I told him exactly what I had thought of it.

 

“It was an alright school.  I knew more than most of the professors, but that was to be expected.  They let outdated moral principles stand in the way of progress.  They thought I was too radical.  I was kicked out last year.”

 

“I’m sorry,” he replied.

 

“Don’t be.  I learn more on my own than I ever did at that place.  I’ve mastered wandless magic in the month I’ve been out of school alone, for one thing.”  I remember him looking a little impressed.  I remember because most wizards would be shocked at a sixteen year old mastering wandless magic, a skill many never learn unless they pursue certain career paths.  But Albus just raised one eyebrow at me with that half smile on his face.  That lit me on fire with the desire to impress him.

 

We spoke for hours that afternoon.  I told him things I had never told anyone before.  Things about my family and Germany.  I foolishly told him what I knew of the deathly hallows, that first day I met him.  He was special and he pierced me from the start.  Albus told me of Ariana, and of his anger with being grounded to the village he had hated his entire life.  Eventually he confessed something else to me, offhandedly as if not realizing the significance of it; he was gay.

 

“Not that I’ve ever been with anyone,” he had lamented.  “I didn’t exactly have anything to offer the boys at Hogwarts.” 

 

“I find that incredibly difficult to believe.”

 

“It’s true.  I cared more for potions and advanced spells, even if they had shown an interest.  And my mother would have been displeased.  Not that I was very bothered with that.” 

 

“Well,” I asked slyly, “Have you ever met anyone you wanted to be with?”

 

“Of course,” he replied indignantly.  “There were men at Hogwarts that I wanted to fuck.”

 

“Anyone anywhere else?” I don’t know how he grew up to be, but at seventeen, Albus Dumbledore was incredibly thick and unable to pick up hints.  All I wanted was to be in this beautiful man’s bed, being his first, but eventually I had to outright kiss him in order for him to catch on.  

 

That first kiss is so vivid in my old mind.  His lips were soft, giving in to my hungry ones pressing against him.  He kissed uncertainly, so delicately, even as I wove my fingers through his hair and pulled his face into mine, bumping his glasses against my nose.  Behind his softness, there was an ocean of need, and he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him on the couch where we were sitting.  I don’t recall our clothes coming off, but suddenly they were gone and we were kissing naked on the couch, praying his brother and sister didn’t come in.  We were both hard, rubbing against each other with desires so intense I could have screamed.  

 

I can feel his cock in my hand, hear his soft moans and his breath against my neck, smell the scent of lemon drops and old parchment.  His hands explored my body gently, touching every inch until I was on fire.  Finally his cock found its way in between my legs, probing at my ass.  He looked to me as if for permission, which I gave with an eager nod, wordlessly casting a preparation spell so that he wouldn’t tear me apart with his wide girth.  

 

Then he was inside me, on top of me on the couch, one of his legs hanging over the end. Dumbledore was clumsy and eager, struggling to set a rhythm.  His thrusts started out uncertain and shallow, though he, at least was enjoying it given by his panting moans.  My hands locked around his waist, guiding his thrusts until he was hitting the right spots and I joined him in moaning.  It wasn’t the best sex I had ever had.  It wasn’t even close to that.  A young virgin was pounding away at me erratically, and yet when he was inside me I felt like I’d found the missing piece of my soul.  He finished first, and jerked me off until I came in his hand.  Something about that made Albus look embarrassed, and he quickly stood, pulling on his clothes.  

 

“I should go tend to Ariana and Aberforth.”  I was disappointed, but accepted being kicked out.  I retreated to my room back at my aunt’s place, brooding over if I would ever see the blue-eyed beauty again or if I had scared him off.  

 

Later that night, I awoke to hear an owl tapping at my window.  Albus had sent me a letter, apparently too eager to wait until the next day.  I still have it, as I do most of the letters he sent me.  Germany’s counsel at least allows me that.

 

_ Gellert- _

_ I have been thinking about what you said about the Deathly Hallows.  At first I pushed them off as an old silly fairytale, but I have not been able to stop examining the evidence again and again in my mind.  I think that it is certain, at least, that the elder wand exists, given its bloody trail throughout history.  And the existence of one of the Hallows leads to the others being more likely.  Searching Godric’s Hollow for more evidence is a brilliant idea and I would love to join you.  I have not been able to stop thinking about you since you left. _

_ A. _

  
In the throes of teenage infatuation, I probably skipped around the house elatedly or some other such silly display of joy.  I can no longer recall that, but I wrote him back, asking him to meet me at the Old Church the next day.  Out of some silly impulse I thought was wit at the time, I wrote his name with the A as the symbol of the Deathly Hallows.  This became the way he signed his name when he wrote to me from then on.  It was something that was just ours.  I wish that I had something more than lines on tattered parchment to remember the greatest man I ever knew, but I am left with that and memories.  Memories I must record before I forget.


	2. Ignotus Peverell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gridelwald recounts his experiences the day he found the grave of Ignotus Peverell.

The next day, Albus and I shared a cup of tea outside the old church.  The morning air bit at us in the pale light of the sky before sunrise, but just being around him seemed to shield me from the worst of the cold.  We wandered into the graveyard, avoiding the tombstones as I searched for the grave of Ignotus Peverell.  I hadn’t told Albus what I was searching for, but he followed me obediently like a puppy nonetheless.  He had been a bit awkward at first that morning, as if not entirely sure how to react to me now that he had been inside my ass, but we quickly warmed back up to each other as we walked.  He was eager to hear more about why I was expelled from Durmstrang, and I was eager to keep him from learning exactly why so as not to scare him off.  I still foolishly believed myself to be the wounded party, but I knew enough of the world at this point to know that most wizards would be appalled.  

 

“Did you kill someone?” he asked, blue eyes sparkling.

 

“No, Albus, I did not  _ kill _ someone.  Germans aren’t so barbaric that they wouldn’t lock up a murderer.”

 

“Well, then what?  You said they had outdated morals.”

 

“They did have outdated morals.”

 

“What kind of outdated morals?”

I sighed in defeat.  I had known this boy for a day, and yet somehow he made me wish to give up my deepest secrets, to share my innermost thoughts with him.  Perhaps even then I could sense his open-mindedness.

 

“What do you think about the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy?”

 

“I think it is inconvenient and repressive.  When laws are brought about by fear they are rarely benevolent.  I believe that the persecution of wizards and witches led to the creation of the Statute.  However, now, it is probably necessary,” Albus said slowly, watching my face to gauge a reaction.  I kept my face studiously blank, and my mind too, just in case Albus was a legilimens.  He was brilliant enough that it was possible.

 

“What if it wasn’t necessary?”

 

“Well, if it wasn’t, that would be nice.  But it is, now.  For our protection and the protection of muggles,” he replied, an uncertain frown on his face.  

 

“I believe otherwise,” I replied, holding a bit of agitation back.  “There was a boy in my year.  His name was Hans.  Hans was a normal student, above average even.  Excellent at potions.  But he had a condition that caused his skin to change colors unexpectedly, from blue, orange, green, you name it.” Albus smirked a little at this image.

 

“This condition got worse his third year at school,” I continued, my tone bitter.  “His hair would change styles on its own, rapidly, from very short to down to his knees. Sparks flew out of his nose on bad days. Eventually a ministry crony was sent to evaluate him.  Hans tried his best to hide his disfiguration, but the ministry decided that he was a threat to the Statute of Secrecy.  He was shipped off to Hg. Claire’s, the largest magical hospital in Germany, and committed to the criminally insane ward involuntarily.”  

 

I glanced back at Albus’s face and saw that anger that seemed to lurk under his skin rising up in his face.  Anger was good, in my young mind.  It gave wizards the strength to do what I thought would need to be done.

 

“I knew Hans.  I knew he wasn’t crazy.  Like werewolves and vampires, his condition was demonized because muggles could see it.  Muggles stopped a promising boy from getting an education and from having any semblance of a life.  Well, not muggles.  Our fear of them.  And I knew Hans wasn’t alone.  So many of us have been harmed by an outdated, evil law, that I felt, and still feel, mind you, that something ought to be done.

“I planned out what I would do for years.  And prepared myself for it.  I knew that I was likely to be expelled after I carried out my plan, and I was, of course.  I gathered a few others around me who felt similarly after Hans was abducted.  We researched every law and piece of history associated with the Statute of Secrecy: how it was created, why it was created, the historical opposition to it in the past, everything we could think of. And then we decided to act.  I chose the symbol of the Deathly Hallows as our mark, because it’s the ultimate symbol of wizard strength and unity.  One day, I carved it deep into the wall of the school, and set out with my cohorts to a muggle village nearby.”  

 

I paused again to read Albus’ face.  He looked angry and thoughtful, but did not appear to hate me yet.  I gathered my resolve and pushed on.

 

“We did not go there with the intention of hurting any of them.  We wanted to make a statement about wizards’ rights, and our oppression.  But we were angry.  We set about the town casting spells, harmless at first, like fireworks and conjurings of creatures.  The muggles were afraid, and it is in a muggle’s nature to respond with violence.  They wanted to destroy us, and an angry mob of them gathered around.  We fought our way out, and I believe we made the statement that we wished to make. Seven of them later died.  None of us were harmed.  The Deathly Hallow’s insignia was blazed into the sky about the village by one of my companions, and the Swedish ministry was forced to wipe the memories of the other villagers.  I was the instigator, of course, and I was lucky that I was not imprisoned.  The others were punished within the school, and I was expelled.”

 

Albus’ eyes were shining with a hard emotion I wasn’t quite sure how to identify.  He pushed me against a tomb and kissed me, with a fire that hadn’t been there yesterday.  I melted under his touch, falling into his burning kiss eagerly.  After a moment, I pulled back. 

 

“What was that for?”

 

“You fight for the greater good,” he said, eyes still hard.  “Harming muggles is horrible, of course, but you did it to help wizardkind.  I admire that.  My father was imprisoned for that.  I-I never had the strength to fight for the greater good.  I fit well into the wizarding world as I know it, but now I want to.”

 

“The greater good,” I mused.  “I like that.  That is what is the most important foundation of this cause.  We do it for the greater good.  Of muggles and wizards.”

 

Albus grinned and leaned forward to kiss me again.  The tomb wall was cold against my back, but he was warm. I wanted his fire.  I could feel him hard against my stomach as he pushed into me, hands in my hair.  He panted into my mouth, breath full of lust.  His hands fumbled around my robes, tugging them up to gain access underneath.  I grinned at him, shocked that I had found someone willing to shag me in a cemetery in the daylight.  He grabbed my cock, stroking it furiously with a confidence he hadn’t shown yesterday.  Moments later, he was on his knees in front of me, licking me as if I was the most delicious thing he had ever tasted.  Every touch of his tongue sent shivers of pleasure through my body, and I groaned gripping his hair.  It had been two minutes and already I was right on the edge, filled with the excitement of being caught and the chill of the breeze on my legs.  

 

“Stop,” I gasped.  “Fuck me.  Please.”

  
Albus got up so quickly he could have been imperiused.   He turned me around to lean against the tombstone as he pulled his large cock out of his robes (Albus, if you’re reading this, you can’t be angry that I am revealing our secrets, because I am being very flattering about your dick).  I murmured a preparation spell hastily as he shoved himself inside of me, filling me as I let out a moan that was half pleasure and half pain.  He was a little too big for me, although he didn’t seem to care much.  Albus gasped in pleasure as he thrust deeply into me, burying his dick entirely.  He began to increase his speed, and I groaned as he stroked my prostate with every thrust.  He was pounding into me so hard that I could barely stand, and I knew I wouldn’t last long.  I gripped my cock and began to stroke, but he swatted my hand out of the way and replaced it with his own, grunting as he jerked me and fucked me at the same time.

 

The pleasure was overwhelming and all I could do was try to keep standing as I felt it rushing over me, punctuated by the animalistic sounds coming from Dumbledore.  When I couldn’t take it anymore, I came, sending thick ropes of cum onto the undersides of my robes, gasping at the intensity of my orgasm.  Albus was cumming too, I remember, gripping me as if my dick was the only thing keeping him upright as he shot his load into me.  

 

I fell up against the tomb, twitching in desecration of the dead as I regained my breath.  Albus leaned against me, his breath warm on my neck as he did, wrapping his arms around my waist.  

 

“I’ve never been fucked like that,” I said honestly.

 

“I’ve never fucked like that,” he said ruefully, a little bashful again.  “I just did what felt good.”

 

“Well you did well.”  He smiled against me, and I felt the heat of a blush hitting my neck.  

 

“So, besides telling old school stories and getting fucked, did you have a plan for the cemetery today?”

 

“Oh, damn, yes.  I nearly forgot.” I pushed him off me, straightening my robes as I did so.  Albus fussed with his hair for a moment before deciding that it was probably a lost cause, and we set off through the cemetery again.  My breath caught in my chest as my gaze fell upon an ancient tombstone, where the faded markings of a triangle, circle, and line could still be seen.

 

“This is it!” I exclaimed, falling to my knees to examine the grave.  “Ignotus Peverell.  They’re real, Albus, all of them.  The deathly hallows are real.”


	3. Ariana

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grindelwald meets the other Dumbledores and introduces Albus to new philosophies

That mark on the grave of that man, brilliant sorcerer Ignotus Peverell, who had two brothers that were equally brilliant had me utterly convinced.  My evidence was perhaps not convincing enough to reach anyone else, but I knew without a shadow of a doubt that the hallows existed, and more than that, one of them had been here in Godric’s Hallow.  I traced the marking reverently, overcome by the sheer weight of the revelation I had just experienced. 

 

“This proves that they are real?” Albus asked, those brilliant eyes questioning my judgement.

 

“Yes.  The Peverell’s were the three brothers.  Their lineage can be traced down to all of their descendants.  The Gaunts, the Grays and the Potters for example.  They were among the most powerful wizards of their time.  Do you know what this means, Albus? If we could find them all, we could have the power to work real good in the world.  Who would dare oppose us?  We could get justice to all of the wizards who have been oppressed for the last few hundred years.”

 

Albus considered this for a moment, a half smile upon his lips.  “Gellert, if you’re right this would mean a huge change for the wizarding world.  What does the legend say? That whoever joins all of the Hallows will be the master of death?”

 

“Yes, yes, the master of death.  But even if we just found one of them-say, the elder wand.  We could attain as much as we needed to with only that.”

 

“We would have to be very careful.  We don’t want to hurt anyone who doesn’t need to be hurt.  How would we even change the wizarding world, anyways? Overtake it?”

 

“In the short term, yes,” I said grimly.  “The bias towards muggles is strong enough right now that the wizarding world would never agree any other way.  We need to make people understand that we were given a power that muggles were not.  Muggles run off of animal instinct alone.  When they are frightened, they attack.  When they are hungry, they attack.  They brutalize one another and constantly fight among themselves for the best territory or best food or best women.  Not only would the wizards be better off if we could be in control of the world and open about who we are, the muggles could be given a structure that would lead them to be happier as well.”

 

My blonde lover frowned a little.  “That must be what we stress above all else when trying to draw others to this cause.  Our actions are justified by the fact that we are doing them for the greater good.  Most wizards acknowledge that muggles simply don’t have the same power of reasoning as we do.  Biologically, they are mentally inferior.  So why is it that we allow those we acknowledge as mentally inferior to keep us hidden and in fear?”

 

I grinned at him.  I had never met someone who so instantly realized what I meant before.  Albus could read my mind and find my plans quicker than a niffler could steal a watch.  There was never an equal to me, in my mind, before Albus.  He matched me in every way.  He was perfect.  If he didn’t have his siblings to care for, I would have dragged him across the globe with me on a wild goose chase to find the subjects of an old fairytale.

 

“Exactly.  You’re right.  We’ll have to plan this out carefully if we are to even have a chance at succeeding.  Let’s begin by studying the history of the Elder Wand! Durmstrang’s library had a few mentions of it in the older history texts, but not enough detail.  Is your town’s library any good?”

 

Albus shrugged.  “No, but I can get us into Hogwarts.”

 

“How?” I asked, dumbstruck.  Hogwarts was notoriously difficult for intruders to enter, even if they were former students.

 

“I tinkered with the apparition charms so they’d let me apparate in.”  He was blushing slightly, as if embarrassed at his ingenuity in being able to obtain something no grown wizards alive would have been able to.

 

“Merlin’s balls, Albus.”  I was awestruck.  “You managed to bypass an anti-apparition charm? I don’t think that’s been done before.”

 

“The thieves who’ve achieved it in the past wouldn’t go bandying the fact about,” he deflected.  “Anyways.  We could go tonight.  Once everyone is asleep.  I’ll leave Aberforth in charge of Ariana and we’ll go read for a few hours.”

 

That was the most romantic thing anyone had ever said to me.  It figures that the best way to woo me, even then, was to offer to sneak me into a library at night to conduct research on a weapon that had killed thousands of wizards in its lifetime.  In that moment, I knew irrevocably that I loved him.  I, the heartless carefree dark wizard who would go on to kill hundreds of peoples and sow destruction in the name of obscure philosophies, had fallen in love with a young boy with piercing eyes in two days.  Not that I told him, of course.  

 

“Alright,” I said.  “Shall I meet you at eleven outside your place?”

 

“You could come back to my place now,” Albus said in a forced casual tone.  The aura of tension radiating off of him made it clear that he was anything but casual.

 

“Oh, alright.  If your family wouldn’t mind.”

 

“Not at all.  You can meet Ariana and Aberforth.  Although I should warn you about them.  I told you Ariana is an invalid.  That’s not entirely true.  Most of the time she’s very sweet, docile and kind.  She loves books and gardening.  But some muggle boys attacked her when she was a child, and her magic has twisted against her ever since.  She has spells of madness and uncontrollable bursts of power.”

 

“Is she… Albus, is she an obscurial?”  

 

“No, no, we don’t think so.  She isn’t dangerous most of the time.  She’s just a bit mad, that’s all.”

 

I heaved a hard sigh of relief.  

 

“How do you even know what an obscurial is?”

 

“I met one once,” I muttered looking at the ground.  “She didn’t live long.”

 

“I see,” Albus said, seeing I was uncomfortable.  “Aberforth, on the other hand.  Aberforth is… well, odd.  He prefers to spend most of his time in the forest bordering the village.  Doesn’t like to speak much.  He loves Ariana though.  Aberforth’s a good lad, just a little strange.”

 

My pain at Albus’ predicament grew.  Not only did he have to tend to his siblings, but both of them were strange and unrelatable.  Life just was not fair sometimes, and Albus had the worst luck of any wizard I had ever met.

 

“Alright, I’ll come with you to meet your mad siblings.” Albus smiled widely at me and led the way past the church back to his street.  I followed him a little apprehensively.  

 

“How old is your sister?” I asked, gently probing for more information that could prove she was an obscurial after all.

 

“Fourteen,” Albus replied a bit tersely as if he knew what I was up to.  

 

“And your brother?”

 

“Aberforth is fifteen,” Albus replied in a softer tone.  “He wants to drop out of school to stay with Ariana but obviously I won’t allow that.”   
  


“Ah.” If Aberforth was as strange as Albus seemed to think he was, perhaps it would be best if he was to care for Ariana and allow Albus to go off into the world and do as he pleased.  But I knew it wasn’t my place to suggest it, so I held my tongue.  We walked to his house in companionable silence, with Albus a step or two ahead.

 

Albus unlocked the door, and there was a high pitched squeal from inside of the house. As he opened it, a young girl with tangled long brown hair rushed at him and embraced him as if she hadn’t seen him in years.

 

“Albus!” she shrieked, clinging tightly to him.

 

“Hello, Ari,” he said in a voice muffled by hair.  “How was your morning?”

 

“Wonderful! We went to the pond and threw stones at the ducks.”  Albus shook his head as he untangled himself from his sister.

 

“Why would you throw stones at the ducks?”

 

“Well, we didn’t have any bread,” she explained, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.  Ariana turned towards me as if seeing me for the first time.  Her eyes were the same blue as Albus’, but hers were haunted, deeply sunk into her face.  Ariana’s mouth hung slightly open as if she was constantly curious, and her skin was a pale grey color.  She looked quite mad, but she didn’t look like an obscurial.  

 

“Tomorrow I’ll have to leave you some bread so you don’t torment those poor ducks.” Ariana giggled.  “This is my friend Gellert.”

 

Ariana half hid behind him like a child afraid of strangers.  Albus pulled her out with a scolding look. 

 

“H-hello, Gellert.”

 

I knelt down to her level, taken by the strange girl.  “Hello, Ariana.  Did the ducks like your stones?”

 

She nodded, sucking her thumb as she did so which earned another pointed glance from Albus. 

 

“Where’s Aberforth, Ari?”

 

“In his room.  He’s sleeping.”

 

“Ah, well we can let him sleep.  Would you like some tea?” he asked turning back towards me.  “We can make some tea and sandwiches-scratch that, we don’t have bread.  Well some tea and biscuits, then, and eat outside.  It’s a lovely day.  And Ari likes it outside, don’t you Ari?”

 

She nodded shyly again, but didn’t suck her thumb this time.  

 

We spent the afternoon making a few different kinds of biscuits and teas.  Ariana warmed up to me after a while and soon was laughing and running around me in excitement of the sweets.  Albus looked far more awkward bumbling about the kitchen than he did when discussing philosophy, or fucking me, but he managed his biscuit making admirably, nonetheless.  He doted on his sister in quite an endearing way, and she clearly adored him. The three of us were outside enjoying the fruits of our labors when Aberforth finally appeared.

 

“Aberforth! There are biscuits and the kitchen.  Go grab some and join us,” Albus invited with that half smile of his. 

 

“Nice of you to come home, Albus.”  Aberforth was a surly looking teenager with a scowl etched into his features.  He didn’t have the natural beauty that Ariana and Albus carried, although his eyes matched theirs.  He seemed to dislike me on sight- and Merlin knows I hated him right back.  “Who’s your boyfriend?” he asked sarcastically, his tone bordering on cruel.

 

“This is Gellert.  Gellert Grindelwald.  He’s staying with Bathilda, our neighbor, for a while.” 

 

Aberforth snorted.  “Well perhaps he should stay there, then, so you can look after your sister.”

 

My blood boiled, and my hand twitched towards my wand.  “Your brother is free to do whatever he pleases.  The two of you still appear to be well looked after and he’s the adult here.  He knows best.”

 

“Whatever,” Aberforth said, stalking back inside.  Albus looked at me apologetically.

  
“Since our mother died he’s been like that.  He’ll get over it eventually.  But perhaps you should go for now.  I’ll see you tonight?” I nodded, a little disappointed, but left to spend some time with my aunt.  Aberforth’s self-righteous face seemed burned into my vision, and I couldn’t help but wish there were only two Dumbledore siblings.


	4. Library Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys invade Hogwarts' library and have celebration sex.

When I met Albus that night he looked more weary than usual.  The fight with Aberforth that had likely ensued after my departure was clearly taking a toll on him.  His eyes lit up when he saw me, though, as if I was the best person in the world he could be seeing.  To my surprise, he met my arrival to the outside of his house with a deep embrace and a kiss.  I pretended embarrassment but was secretly elated.  Perhaps I was beginning to mean more to Albus than just easy sex and philosophy.  

 

“Are you ready to set foot in the greatest school for witchcraft and wizardry the world has ever seen?”  

 

I snorted in disdain.  “Perhaps the fourth best if you’re lucky.” 

 

His blue eyes twinkled under the lamp light, and he graced me with an almost smile.  “Maybe right now, only because I’ve just left and they haven’t been able to fill the hole of my absence.”

 

“Before you left they were fifth best.”

 

“Very funny.  You’re just jealous because you had to attend Durmstrang.”

 

“Like my ideas would have been received kindly at Hogwarts.  I’m lucky I went to Durmstrang so I wasn’t arrested.”

Albus nodded in mock defeat, his eyes still smiling.  “So would you like to hear the plan?”

 

“Why don’t I get to help with the plan?” I asked indignantly.

 

“Do you know anything about Hogwarts?”

 

“No,” I replied sulkily, a little offended that Albus hadn’t included me in his scheming.  I wasn’t used to being the follower and I resolved not to let him make me one again.

 

“Right, then.  We’ll need to apparate directly into the library, and cast silencing spells as we do so- to mask the cracking.  I reckon we’ll have to disarm a few alarms meant to keep students out of the restricted section, and burglars.  Should be simple.  No one patrols the corridors during the summer.  We’ll borrow the books and I’ll send them back with Aberforth at the start of term.”

 

“That’s an excellent plan, Albus,” I admitted goodnaturedly.  “And how much trouble could we really get for being in a library during the summer?  It will be quite the adventure.”

 

He gave me a full smile at that, grabbing my hand excitedly.  

 

“Oh! I almost forgot! We should make ourselves invisible, as a precaution.  I’m sure you know how?” I answered with a roll of my eyes and cast the necessary spells to conceal myself.  

 

“Ready?” he asked.

 

“I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life.” I said with a grin.  Albus grabbed my hand again and apparated us both.  I remembered to cast a quick silencio as we whirled through the air, landing in a huge library lit by only the light of the moon.  It was far more extensive than any library I had ever seen before, and I stared in awe at all of the books on the walls.  There must be enough knowledge here to learn everything anyone would ever want to know.  I promised myself that someday I would help the wizarding world build libraries like this all over the world, to bring this to as many young wizards and witches as I could.  A truly educated populace would never agree to uphold laws like the Statute of Secrecy, and educating the next generation would ensure that something similar to it would never arise again.

 

“Did you say something about Durmstrang being the greatest wizarding school?” Albus whispered, and I became keenly aware of my mouth gaping open as I looked around.

 

I laughed softly, partly in embarrassment, partly in elation at the thrill of breaking and entering.

 

“What, this? This is nothing.  We have dungeons filled with medieval torture devices that we are allowed to tinker with.  I’d like to see that at Hogwarts.”  

 

I heard a snort from the darkness and a slip of parchment appeared in the air.  I grabbed it.  

 

_ Sections to Search _

_ History: From the years 1250-present.   _

_ Dark Magicks: focus on wands of power, legends of elder wand.  These will likely be in the restricted section _

_ Philosophy- Look for books on utilitarianism.  This isn’t for the Elder wand, it’s for your other grand ideas. _

_ -Albus _

 

I smirked when I realized that he had written his name with the mark of the deathly hallows for his A.  I was already having quite an influence on him.  Albus had circled the history section, and written the Hallows’ symbol next to it, indicating that he would take the history section, and I set off in search of the Dark Magic books, disarming several simple alert hexes as I walked down the long aisles of the restricted section looking for the section on wands.  I was slightly disappointed to realize that I had already read several of the books specifically about the elder wand.  There were a few that I hadn’t heard of, though, and many on the properties of wands with a propensity for performing dark magic.  I grabbed three that looked the most useful, along with a book of lore I had already read for Albus and headed back towards the middle of the library. 

 

Albus was in the process of putting a large stack of books into his bag, well I assumed it was Albus- it could have been a friendly ghost, and he was only up to the 17th century.  This would be quite the task, but  I felt confident that two brilliant wizards such as myself and Dumbledore would be able to accomplish it.  The rewards would be well worth it.  I headed towards the philosophy section, passing by a section for catching magical beasts and another for curing magical ailments.  Admittedly, there wasn’t much philosophy taught at Durmstrang, so I didn’t know much about Utilitarianism, but there were at least fifty books on the subject on the shelves at Hogwarts, so I grabbed a few that looked the most interesting, and trotted back to Albus and his extendable bag.  He appeared to have grabbed the most relevant books on history that he wanted, and a large stack of books was placing itself into the bag apparently on its own.  

 

Suddenly, we heard footsteps right outside of the library door.  We both froze as the footsteps stopped, and the large oak doors of the library began to open.  I whirled back towards Albus and was relieved to see that the bag had vanished, along with his stack of books. I vanished my own, but one of the older ones couldn’t be vanished by my simple  _ evanesco.   _ I panicked and threw it at a nearby table where it landed with a loud thud.  The doors split to reveal a formidable figure with long black robes decorated with the badge of a green snake.  In the moonlight, many of his features were shrouded, but I could make out a head of hair so blond it almost looked white, and a staff in his hand that made him look like a fairy story Wizard of old.  

 

_ “ _ Who’s there?” His sharp words shattered the uneasy silence _ , _ and I gulped.  I knew we could fight our way out of the castle if necessary, but I did not think Albus would take kindly to killing what was probably one of his old professors. 

 

“ _ Homenum Revelio!”   _ I cursed in my head.  I had forgotten to protect myself against revealing charms, like an idiot, and the warmth of the charm burned at my heart, shining out to betray me.  The figure’s mouth curled into an unpleasant smile, and he slowly glided towards me.  I gripped my wand, ready for the inevitable fight that was to come.  Taking a deep breath, I pointed it at the figure.

 

“ _ Stupe-”  _ Then there was a hand on my arm, and I was twisting and compressing through space, Albus at my side.  We landed in front of his house, visible again.  Albus looked shocked and a little afraid, so naturally my first instinct was to burst into laughter, electrified by our close call.  He glared at me as if I were insane for a moment, as I fell against him, laughing my heart out, but his scowl gave way to a grin and Albus let out a chuckle or two himself.  

 

“You’re bloody mad,” he murmured, pulling me into a kiss.  Sparks flew between us as the tension ebbed, and I kissed him back.  The adrenaline rushing through me refused to abate, so I tried to force some of it into Albus, biting his lip and raking my nails down his back over his robe.  He gripped my hair roughly, pulling me harder into the kiss as he forced his tongue into my mouth.  His other hand gripped the front of my robes, pulling at them violently until they ripped open.  Albus ripped them apart until I was standing in nothing but my shorts, shivering in the chilly night air.  Although they had been specially tailored, and among my favorites, I found myself not caring as his rough hands moved across my body, pulling at me and forcing me against him.  He grabbed my ass firmly, squeezing it until I let out a yelp of pain.  He grinned at this, and kissed me again, holding me against him with one arm as he slapped my ass with the other.  

 

I vanished his robes wordlessly, until he was naked against me.  His cock was hard against my stomach as he spanked me, like he was letting all of his frustrations at the past few months out through his hand.  I raked my nails down his chest so hard I left welts, some of which showed glimmers of blood, as he continued his assault on my mouth, nipping at my lips gently as he groped my body wherever he could reach.  Albus released me, and pushed me to my knees.  

 

I stared at the thick hard cock in front of my face for a moment, admiring its soft curve that stroked me so well.  Albus grabbed my hair and firmly shoved my face against it, groaning as I managed to make contact with the head of his dick, sucking it gently.  He forced me to take more into my mouth, shoving my head down on his shaft until I gagged.  He was moaning, forcing my head up and down roughly as I deep-throated him, almost managing to fit all of him into my mouth.  I licked along his shaft as he thrust his hips into me, desperate for more contact.  I felt my own cock pressing up hard against my shorts, so hard it almost hurt from lack of contact.  

 

After a while, he pushed my face into the ground, with my hips up and ready for him.  Neither of us cast a preparation charm this time, as I was desperate to feel him taking me with no lubricant needed.  He vanished my shorts, and I felt the warm press of the head of his penis against my ass, slightly wet with precum. He pushed into me quickly letting out a gasp of pleasure that partly masked my own grunt of pain.  My ass was on fire as Albus thrust primally into me, desperate for release.  After a few minutes the blinding pain faded, and I felt his cock stroking against my prostate, sending shivers of pleasure through me.  I heard a high pitched whining, and was shocked to realize it was coming from me, drawn from my prostate.  

  
My dick ached from the lack of contact, and I glanced behind me, eyes begging Albus to touch me.  He was too preoccupied with his own pleasure as he thrust into me harder and faster than I thought was possible.  I found myself somehow on the edge of an orgasm, even though my cock lay untouched against me.  Albus thrust against me, and I pushed back, desperate for any contact he would give me as he filled me up, thrusts becoming shorter and more insistent now.  He pushed into me one last time and let out a strangled growl as he came, filling me with warmth and pushing me over the edge.  My cock twitched against my stomach as it finally found release, pouring semen out onto me and the ground below me as my ass contracted, milking Albus’ dick for any remaining sperm.  My vision went black and my mind was blank as a shooting  white pleasure filled my brain.  All I could do was moan and lean back into Dumbledore until my orgasm finally subsided.  I fell asleep with him inside me, with our arms wrapped around each other.  When I awoke, we had ended up in Albus’s bed, and I was still clinging to him tightly as if I knew he was the only chance I had at being saved.


	5. Uncontrolled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ariana has an episode

The next week was by far the happiest of my life.  Albus and I spent every waking moment together, and as many sleeping moments as my Aunt Bathilda would allow.  The nights I didn’t stay with Albus, we stayed up late, writing each other messages and plotting how to achieve a greater good.  We debated whether it was more moral to save the most amount of people or to save the most important people.  Long after the devil had gone to bed, we discussed the worth of a human life, and whether a muggle life was worth less than a wizard’s life.  Although Albus and I agreed that a peaceful takeover with as little loss of life as possible would be ideal, I was always more open to the idea of muggles as collateral damage than he was.  He thought that we should go to great lengths to avoid harming muggles, while I saw their destruction as unfortunate but ultimately necessary for some of them.  Nevertheless, our debates stayed academic and cordial, and  we agreed, mostly, when it came to philosophy.  

 

He was so intoxicating.  Albus was my heroin and I never wanted anything more than I wanted him.  The way he smelled, the way he held me, the way he looked.  I couldn’t get enough of him.  And he couldn’t get enough of the laughing sandy-haired boy who stole him away from his siblings every morning.  Albus started to spend more time with me, leaving Ariana under the care of Aberforth so that we could read, debate and fuck.  Aberforth began to hate me more than he had before.  He resented me for taking his brother away.  He resented me, I think, because he thought I made Albus gay.  He was always an odd boy.  Albus and I began to spend more time at the house, to appease Aberforth and keep Ariana company.  

 

The first time I saw Ariana lose control was a Sunday.  Aberforth said that he was going to church, but really he needed a break from Albus and I, and watching Ariana.  Albus, Ariana and I were playing a game of exploding snap, which was fairly usual for us.  Ariana loved the game, giggling every time a card exploded.  That day, though, she was on edge, as if without Aberforth her magic was a little more free.

 

“Al?” she asked sweetly. She was the only one who could get away with calling him Al.

 

“Yes, Ariana?”

 

“What does it feel like to die?”

 

Albus and I exchanged glances, and I shrugged, entirely unable to deal with this side of parenthood.

 

“What do you think it feels like?” he asked.

 

“I think it must be very painful.  The people who whisper in my head scream sometimes.  Mother screamed when she was dying.  Aberforth says it doesn’t hurt them, but I think it does.”  Albus looked shaken.

 

“Ari, what happened to mother wasn’t your-”

 

“Stop saying that!” Ariana said suddenly, standing up and inadvertently levitating the cards.  “It is my fault.  I did it..  I made her die.  I-ARGH!” 

 

The cards fell to the ground, exploding loudly, which set her off.  The girl began to scream an inhuman scream, and blue tendrils of plasma flew around her, lifting her off of the ground.  Ariana lifted one arm parallel to the ground with her palm open, pointed straight at Albus, and I knocked him to the ground just before a white ball of light hurtled into the place he had been sitting, leaving a scorch mark.  

 

“Ariana,” Albus began in a calm voice.  “Ariana remember who you are.  You can control this.  Ariana Dumbledore, come down here.  We’ll get some lemonade.” 

 

Ariana’s eyes glowed a little from the magic trapped inside her.  I watched helplessly as the adorable little girl I had gotten to know suddenly became something far beyond our help.  Albus was right.  Ariana was entirely mad.  In that moment, holding onto Albus in  sad fascination, all I wanted was to find a way for this girl to live a normal life.  It would be easier to lock her away in an institution and forget about her, like many wizarding families did when there were no solutions.  But if the wizarding community was FORCED to find solutions, Ariana could be free.  Albus could be free.

 

Both of us stood to get closer to Ariana, knowing that magic would be less than worthless right now.  He grabbed her hand, wincing as if it burned him, and I stroked her arm gently.  We spoke in soothing tones, touching her gently, until she collapsed and began to cry, terrified.  Albus rocked her back and forth as she came back into reality, and her sobs quieted as she fell asleep.  She looked so small lying there in his arms, and so young.  So much younger than fourteen.  My heart broke a little.

 

Albus turned to look at me.  “I can’t leave her.  I can’t go with you and leave her here.  They’ll take her away.”

 

I swallowed the lump in my throat.  “We won’t leave her.  We’ll take her with us.  We can take care of her, together.  We brought her down today.”

 

Albus skeptically looked at me.  “How?”

 

“I don’t know.  We’ll find a way.  We won’t abandon her when she is the face of the cause we’re trying to champion.”

 

He gave me a sad, worn out smile.  “If you went to Hogwarts, you definitely would have been a Gryffindor.”

 

“A what?”

  
“Nevermind.  I need to get her to bed.  I’ll be back.”

 

Of course, Aberforth made his appearance right after Albus left the room.  I nodded at him politely, trying to keep the scorn from my face and failing miserably.  He surveyed the damage done to the room, and his permanent scowl deepened.

 

“Ariana had an episode.”

 

“Yes,” I replied.  “Albus and I talked her down from it.  She’s sleeping now.”

 

“How did you upset her?” he accused, eyebrows so low they obscured his eyes.

 

“I didn’t.  She upset herself.  She was worried about if dying hurt.”

 

“What were you talking about that made her think about dying?”   
  


I threw up my hands in exasperation.  “Nothing! I didn’t do anything, you stupid boy.  Your sister is mentally ill and had an episode where she couldn’t control her magic or her body.  These episodes can be triggered or random.  I’ve studied them far more than you have.”

 

“I’ve lived with her for far longer than you have,” Aberforth growled in a low voice.  “And I know that since you’ve been here her episodes have been getting worse and more frequent.”

 

My wand was in my hand, and my vision was red.  “Did you ever think that could be because she killed her mother in a rage?  And everyone told her it was not her fault?  And no one talked about it with her? How is she supposed to understand what happened, let alone process it, if you all keep pretending that nothing happened?  She isn’t stupid.  In fact she is quite a bit smarter than you are.”

 

Suddenly, his hand reached for his pocket and I reacted without thinking.

 

“ _ Tarantallegra!”  _ I cried, and Aberforth was suddenly forced into dancing uncontrollably.   _ Expelliarmus.   _ The second charm was cast nonverbally, once I had regained enough control to do so.  “Listen here, brat.  Your brother has done more for you than you will ever be able to comprehend.  He and I are going to do more for the world in a year than you could in an entire lifetime.  We are going to find a cure for Ariana, whether you help us or not, but it would be a lot easier without you constantly fighting every single thing we do.”

 

I released him from the spell with a flick of my wand, as Albus walked back into the room, blue eyes wide. 

 

“I thought I heard fighting.  Are you alright?” 

 

Aberforth nodded, red faced, and retreated to his room, slamming the door behind him.

 

“I told him what happened with Ariana,” I explained.  “He got upset.”

 

“Ah,” Albus said quietly, pushing his glasses back on his nose.  “He gets defensive about Ariana.  He knows her better than anyone.”  

 

I grunted, but fell onto the couch with Albus anyways.  

 

“Do you think it hurts to die?” he asked softly.

 

“I don’t know,” I said hopelessly.  “And I don’t want to find out.  If we find the ressurection stone we could ask.”

  
“We could,” he said thoughtfully, pulling me into a kiss as he fell into me, pushing me down into the couch, desperate for any kind of distraction he could find.  He found it slowly in my breath, my hands, my body, pushing himself into me and letting me carry his worries as we became one.


	6. Discretion

The next morning, my Aunt Bathilda sat me down to have a talk. I hadn’t seen much of her the past week, being so preoccupied with Albus and our world of grand ideas, and I felt a little guilty as she patted my arm and handed me a plate with biscuits and a cup of tea. Her face was framed by greying auburn hair, and it was still easy to see that she had been pretty once. Her eyes were a muddy green and they crinkled into a nervous smile as I bit into a biscuit.

 

“Gellert, dear, you know that I love having you here,” she began, wringing her hands. “I love that you’ve taken a shine to Albus Dumbledore. He’s a very sweet boy. Very bright. It makes sense that you two would… get along.”

 

I nodded, bracing myself for the addendum.

 

“But, well, you see, dear-” she cut herself off, looking embarrassed. “Some of the neighbors have been talking about your, er, activities with one another. You understand, of course, that this is rather an older neighborhood and the older generation tends to have certain views about the behavior a wizard should exhibit. I personally am alright with your queer behavior, as long as you do it privately, but I think for the sake of both you and Albus, you two should be more discrete. I would hate to see either of you have your future careers injured because of the passions of youth.”

 

I felt a familiar anger rush to my face. Not at Bathilda, of course, but at the “Some of the neighbors.” How dare anyone care what two consenting adults did in their free time? Was it really so offensive to kiss someone in public? It isn’t as though we’d ever been caught fucking. 

 

“Bathilda, if Albus were to ruin my career, it would be worth it,” I snorted, glaring at her. “This is bloody ridiculous.”

 

“Language,” she scolded, but her eyes were sympathetic. “I know that it must be hard for you, with your desires for homosexual behavior, in this world. I know I don’t understand that. Someday I’m sure you’ll be able to walk down the street holding hands with your, er, friends, and no one will bat an eye. Right now, for your own good, you will have to learn discretion to protect yourself and whomever you choose to see.”

 

My anger abated slightly at her words, and I worked to soften my expression.

 

“You’re right, Aunt Bathilda. I hope my actions did not embarrass you,” I said stiffly, hating myself more with every word. My aunt waved her hand dismissively.

 

“Don’t you worry about that. Just be careful for yourself. And for Albus. I’d hate to see anything happen to either of you.” I nodded and retreated to my room, still a little angry. The world should not have to hide,I thought. I shouldn’t have to hide who I fuck or that I’m a wizard. Heterosexual muggles don’t have to hide anything about who they are, and we shouldn’t either. We can’t fully be free until we can live as who we are.

 

Resolving to add homosexuals to my list of wizards who were constantly having their rights trampled upon, I retreated to my room to read some of the books Albus and I had pilfered. Utilitarianism seemed to encompass many of my ideas concerning the greater good of humanity, and the philosophers in those books articulated them far better than I ever could. I figured that if I wanted to advance my cause, reading these books would be the best way to peacefully win other wizards over to my side. I said a silent prayer to all of the gods I didn’t believe in to thank them for sending me Albus.

 

A rap on my window shook me from my reverie, and I let in Albus’s beautiful barn owl. She pecked at my fingers affectionately as I removed to letter from her claws. 

 

Gellert-  
I missed you this morning. I wanted to take Ariana to the lake on the east side of town today. It’s called Lake Alan and it’s very secluded. We’re unlikely to be bothered. If you can escape your aunt for a few hours, I think we’d both be glad for you to join us.  
Albus

 

I curse at myself for forgetting to meet Albus for breakfast. With Bathilda’s talk, he had completely slipped my mind for a moment. Considering myself lucky he was so mild mannered, I quickly threw on a fresh pair of robes and combed through my blonde hair with my fingers, hoping it was presentable enough for Albus. I surveyed myself in the mirror for a moment, frowning at my sharp features and slightly mussed blonde hair. I tried in vain to fix my appearance, but gave up and apparated to the Dumbledores’ front door. Aberforth opened the door, looking annoyed by the sound. His annoyance deepened as he noticed me.

 

“Albus, your poof is here,” he shouted, glaring at me disgusted. My blood boiled but I managed to keep myself calm, focusing on the door, not the idiot in front of me. Albus appeared, shooting a cold look at his brother who looked slightly chastened as he retreated to his room. 

 

“Sorry about him. Again,” Albus sighed, pulling me inside and slamming the door closed before pulling me into a kiss.

 

“It’s alright,” I glowered, in spite of hour obviously not right it was. “Perhaps I should talk to him.” Albus’ face went blank instantly.

 

“I believe that in this case, that would be a bad idea,” he replied with a small smile. “He’s an angry idiot, but it’s more over our mother’s death than anything else. I worry about him.”

 

“I see.” I tried to swallow my displeasure and remind myself that it wasn’t Albus’s fault he had such a prat for a brother, or that he cared about his siblings. Some men were just born unlucky. “Where’s Ariana?”

 

“She’s reading,” Albus said fondly, nodding in the direction of the couch. Ariana looked up from her book, which was far more thick than a child her age should be capable of reading, and gave me a soft smile, so similar to that of her brother’s. “Want to go to my room? We don’t need to leave for a few hours.”

 

I grinned and took his hand in response, leading the way to his room. Like with everything he did, Albus kept his room orderly and meticulously clean at all times, and I smirked at the military-like precision in which his bed was made. The best part of Albus’s need for cleanliness was the ability to aggravate my lover by mussing up a bed. Albus kissed me, starting out gentle, then growing rougher as his need for me grew. He broke off from me suddenly, those piercing eyes black rimmed by a small sliver of blue hungrily taking in my body..

 

“Gods, you’re beautiful, you know that?” His voice was low and husky as he whispered into my ear, sending a tremor down my spine. 

 

“I know.”

 

He gently removed our robes, and pushed me onto the bed. Straddling me, Albus placed his palm on my chest, feeling my heartbeats. He slowly traced his fingers lightly down my chest, stopping a few inches from my groin. He grabbed my sides with both hands, sliding his arms back towards my shoulders while leaning into me, his face right on top of mine, breath hot on my face. Then, to my astonishment, he collapsed on top of me, nuzzling into my neck. I looked down at him, my aching erection begging, but he just lay there on top of me, looking more content than I’d ever seen him.

 

“Albus?” My voice was a little strained from the weight of him on top of me.

 

“Mmm? Oh, I’m terribly sorry. I was just thinking about how nice it is to see you. I missed you.” The way he admitted it was so simple, so unapologetic, but nonetheless, I could see a hint of nervousness in his face. I laughed softly into his fine blond hair.

 

“I missed you too, Albus. Merlin, what a pair of sissies we are. I saw you yesterday.”

 

“I thought I’d see you this morning,” he said, tone mildly accusing.

 

“Sorry,” I scowled reflexively. “My aunt wanted to give me a lesson on discretion. Apparently neighbors are talking.”

 

“Ah,” he said simply, lifting his face back to mine and meeting my lips once again. I sighed against him, relieved to see that he was going to fuck me after all. I felt a hand gripping my hair, pulling my head back enough that it hurt. I gasped suddenly, and Albus smiled as he pushed me back down, drawing his fingernails sharply down my stomach. I panted, desperate for contact on my throbbing cock and turned on by the twinges of pain caused by Albus. He had other plans, though. One of his hands had found my hair again, and he dragged my head to hang off the bed. He cocked his head, considering something for a moment.

 

“Tap my leg if you want me to stop,” he murmured. Stroking his thick dick, Albus placed its head in my mouth, hissing a little when it made contact. He thrust it into the back of my mouth slowly, testing my limits a little more with each thrust. I gagged suddenly as he bottomed out in my mouth with a groan. 

 

“Damn, you can take the whole thing. Have you been practicing?” I tried to control my breathing as he began to thrust into my mouth more rapidly, letting out pleasured gasps as he did so. I stroked his shaft with my tongue, as much as I could manage while my mouth was being fucked. My cock strained upwards, thrusting into the air, desperate for any kind of contact, but it was left wanting. The taste of Albus and the sounds he was emitting were driving me mad, and I wanted nothing more than for him to fuck me. Albus seemed to be enjoying my ministrations, grabbing the sides of my face and pulling me towards him as he thrust into my mouth over and over again. After a while he let out a lecherous moan that I’m sure our entire neighborhood heard, and I felt him cum in my mouth, the salty taste of him turning me on even more.

 

After what felt like an eternity, he pulled me back onto the bed, and knelt down to give my cock a long slow lick. Shivers flew through me and I twitched involuntarily. Albus grinned and looked up at me mischievously. 

 

“Please?” I asked, making my expression as pitiful as I could as I stared down at him. He took pity on me, and drew me back into his mouth with a slurping sound I would have laughed at under any other circumstances. I rocked my hips up to meet him, unconsciously grunting as I did so. He pushed me back into the bed with a look of mock-warning in his eyes. When he was satisfied that I wouldn’t thrust again, he returned to my cock, moving his mouth up and down on it, deep-throating it effortlessly. I was lost in the pleasure of it, moaning with his every touch, and within minutes I was close. Albus was left with no warning as I came hot spurts of cum into his mouth, gasping at the aftershocks as he licked me clean. 

 

He returned to my side, rubbing his hair against me again like a cat. I wrapped my arms around him, so happy to have him beside me. Albus gave me a few minutes to recover before sighing and rolling off me.

 

“We should head to the lake before it gets too late.” I groaned dramatically, but somehow managed to get to my feet and slip my robes back on. Albus got dressed as well, finishing as he walked up to me and caught me in a hard embrace and a kiss, grinning at me when he was done as if I was the shiniest thing he’d ever seen. He grabbed my hand and we walked back into the living room caught in the afterglow. It took a few minutes for us to realize that Ariana was no longer there.


	7. Wist

Ariana was not in the house.  She wasn’t in the garden out back.  She wasn’t on any of the sidewalks mapping the neighborhood.  We had been searching for about an hour when Aberforth caught up to us, eyes bloody with rage.

 

“Where is she?”

 

“We don’t know,” I tried to explain, “We didn’t leave her for more than half an hour.”

 

“If you fuckers hadn’t left in the first place to go fucking FUCK each other, she wouldn’t be fucking gone.”  Aberforth’s face was bright red, and I could imagine steam rolling off of his brown hair just by seeing his expression.  I felt a small twinge of guilt, mixed with the usual anger every time I interacted with Aberforth, but brushed it aside.

 

“That’s not important now.  We need to find her.  Do you have any idea where she might be?”

 

Aberforth drew his wand and pointed it at me.  “This never would have happened if you hadn’t been here.  You fucking arsehole.”  Albus disarmed him with his usual flourish before I could retaliate.  

 

“Aberforth, get hold of yourself,” he said gravely.  “We need to find her before she hurts herself or someone else.  I’ll check the lake.  Aberforth, check the park.  Gellert, check the churchyard.  If you find her, send a patronus.  Err- Aberforth, you send up green sparks.” I smirked at that, unsurprised that Aberforth was unable to produce a corporeal patronus charm.  Aberforth stalked off in search of his wand, and Albus gave me a quick peck on the cheek before walking quickly towards the direction of the lake.  I shot his brother a mocking grin, before heading towards the church. 

 

The streets were strangely empty for an afternoon, as though the whole world was holding its breath.  The air was still and my feet were loud upon the sidewalk as I approached the old church building.  Even the leaves on the trees stood still as I grew closer, waiting for something to happen.  

 

I found her first.  She was in the graveyard behind the church, sitting cross-legged at her mother’s grave and silently crying.  Large white tears fell onto the tombstone in front of her and her arms hugged the cold marble close to her.  I walked up to the grave, trying not to startle her.  She looked up as I approached, watery blue eyes wide.  She looked like something not quite human- maybe fairy or merfolk, with alien eyes too large for her face and strangely cold, despite the tears streaming down her cheeks.  

 

“Hello Ariana,” I said awkwardly.  

 

“‘Lo, Gel.” Her voice quivered as she gazed up at me.

 

“What are you doing?” I knelt down beside her slowly, trying not to frighten her or send her into a rage.

 

“Just looking.  I wanted to see what death looks like.  But this doesn’t look like anything.  I still don’t know what it looks like.”

 

“I’ve seen death.  It’s nothing you’d want to see, Ari.”

 

“I thought I saw it too, when I killed my mother.” Ariana’s tone was entirely matter of fact and emotionless now.  “But I still don’t know.  Do you think she is still out there?  Did I lose my soul for killing her?”

 

“I killed someone once.”  I was surprised at my admission.  I had never told anyone about the muggle who had gotten in the way while I was in the village near Durmstrang before.  “I didn’t mean to.  But he threatened me and I killed him.  Afterwards I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to feel.  I think I should have regretted it, or been scarred, but all I was left with was how easy it was.  How terrifyingly easy it was to snuff out someone else’s life without even trying.  I don’t know if I believe in souls, but I certainly don’t think that unintentionally causing a death is the same as murder, and I don’t think the former would hurt your soul.”

 

Ariana’s huge blue eyes appraised me for a few moments.  “Thank you.  For being honest with me.  Albus and Aberforth just tell me it wasn’t my fault.  But it was my fault.”

 

“And it was my fault when I killed a man.  And I regret it as I’m sure you do.  But that doesn’t mean our actions must affect us the rest of our lives.”  She looked thoughtful for a moment, then let go of the grave and threw her arms around me.  Her body was cold, and light and fragile; I hugged her back while worried I would break her.  I think I was the first one able to empathize with her and she loved me for that.  A love I returned, as it’s impossible to not to love a child who clings to you asking about death.

 

“I worry, Gellert.  I think I’m losing myself.  Some days I don’t even know who I am.  My own mind plays tricks on me.”

 

“I’ll help you keep yourself.  And your brothers too, even though they don’t understand.  They want to help you if you’ll let them.”  She looked thoughtful as she leaned on my chest and drifted off to an exhausted sleep, occasionally sobbing against me.  I sent my patronus, a phoenix, out to tell the others in the search party that Ariana was alright and I would meet them back at the house.  Then I picked up the little fairy and carried her home.  She was worn out from her morning adventure and slept soundly the whole way home, where I found both of her brothers anxiously awaiting us.

 

I tried to keep them silent as I carried her into her room and lay her gently down on the bed.  Both of them followed me, anxiously hovering over their sister as I placed her down.  I cast a silencing charm on the door to her room, knowing that we were about to have a very loud conversation.  Sure enough, the second we made it back into the living room, Aberforth exploded.

 

“YOU INCONSIDERATE UNTHINKING FOOLS,” he bellowed, throwing his fist into a wall.  “SHE COULD HAVE DIED.  SHE DOESN’T HAVE THE CAPACITY TO JUST TAKE CARE OF HERSELF.  SHE NEEDS AN ADULT.”  

 

Albus and I looked at each other and let him ramble on until he was out of breath.  For once I felt we deserved to be berated.  We should have made sure that Ariana was alright instead of selfishly ignoring her for our own pleasures.  After what seemed like hours, but probably wasn’t, Aberforth stopped and glared at us.

 

“You’re right, Aberforth,” Albus said gravely.  “We made a terrible mistake and we’re lucky she was alright.  It won’t happen again.”

 

“It had better not.  Remember, you’re going to be watching her all of the time once I’m back at school.  You can’t just go running off with your  _ boyfriend _ whenever you want,” he said scathingly.  Albus gave him a slow nod and a clap on the back which his brother dodged.   He smiled sadly at me as Aberforth stormed out of the room and into Ariana’s, no doubt to make sure that our negligence did her no more harm.  

 

“Thank you for finding her,” he said softly, brushing a piece of hair from my eyes.

 

“Of course,” I answered, still ashamed.  “I’m sorry I didn’t help you watch her.”  Albus shook his head, and gave me a half smile, a small twinkle in his eye.

 

“I’m her brother.  It wasn’t your responsibility.”

 

“I care for her too, you know.”

 

“I know,” he said simply.

 

“We can make a world where she doesn’t have to hide.  Where you don’t have to be afraid for her every second.  I want Ariana to be free, Albus.  I hate seeing her like this, like a caged bird that flies away every chance she can.”

 

“I know.  I think we can.  We need to do more research into the deathly hallows.  Find any references to them and pinpoint where they might be now.”

 

“We will,” I promised, “We’ll read the books we have and get more.  We can search the whole world over if we have to.”

 

Albus nodded, pulling me down to sit on the worn leather couch where he cuddled up next to me, his head on my chest as his sister’s had been earlier.  Albus seemed to be as exhausted from the events of the day as Ariana, and he soon drifted off to sleep as I stroked his hair.  I pulled him close to my heart as he slept on me, feeling his warmth mix with my own in a comforting way that was growing familiar. Strangely, I had a fleeting thought that having Albus would not last for much longer.  Perhaps there was seer’s blood in my family, or perhaps it was only a coincidence, but I held him closer, trying to savor every second I could of Albus Dumbledore.  

 

His slightly crooked nose stuck out from his face like a strange rock from the side of the mountain.  All of the frustrations of raising Ariana and dealing with Aberforth and being denied his right to live his own life were gone while he was sleeping, and his face, which was calm even when waking, was unusually serene, as though there were nowhere in the world that he’d rather have been than on the lap of a killer on an old, worn couch while his brother that hated him and his incapacitated sister sat a room away.  I remember wanting to keep him that serene forever.  I think I would have done anything to keep him that way.    

 

There was a large part of me that wanted nothing more out of life than to make Albus and Ariana and I into a proper family. Settle down somewhere Ariana could be happy and watched, while Albus and I went about getting proper jobs.  But still I had this yearning.  This desperate desire to better the world, and to shape it the way I wanted it to be shaped, whether the world liked it or not.  And I knew Albus felt the same. 

  
Some people are born with a calling: a calling that is inescapable no matter how hard one tries to avoid it.  For me, that calling was to fight.  To fight for the rights of those I believed to be underprivileged, and for justice for wizards rather than only justice for muggles.  I went about that the wrong way, I can see now.  But Albus had that calling too, and in many ways I think he has succeeded.  To fight for a just cause alone is not evil.  But actions in the name of the Greater Good are not always just.  Good and Evil are more complicated than most of us mere mortals like to pretend they are, but there is no doubt my actions were evil.  Now I am left with nothing but time to contemplate my sins and wish for things that are not possible, so I ramble on these sheets of paper I am allowed in the hopes that someday someone will see this and understand, the way Ariana needed to be understood.  Not to be justified, but so that someone that saw the world the way I did might change their minds.  And so that more than anyone else, Albus could understand my sorrow and remorse.  


	8. Endings

It all ended far too suddenly, of course. We didn’t even get two months together. I remember everything about that last day, down to the robes I wore. It was bright and sunny. I woke up in his arms, my head against his chest, his hand tangled in my hair. Our eyes met. He pulled me closer, and there was nowhere else I would have rather been than laying on him, warm and half asleep. We lay in silence for a while, neither of us wanting to disturb the other. I was the first to break it.

“Hey, you.” Albus gave me a crooked half smile.

“Hey, you. How’d you sleep?”

I shrugged. “I slept. You?” 

“Someone stole all the covers so I woke up at three,” he said calmly. I grinned up at him.

“You probably deserved it.” Albus grunted back.

“Gellert?”

“Yeah?”

 

“I want to do it.”

“You want to do what?”

 

“I want to go with you and overthrow the Statute of Secrecy.” I sat up and looked down at him.

“What about Ariana?”

“Like you said, we can take her with us. She’s been doing much better lately. She’ll be alright.” 

I stared at him curiously. “What made you change your mind?” 

He met my eyes, looking nervous. “Because I agree with your cause. Because we make a good team, and I don’t think you could manage it without me.” 

I rolled my eyes. He took a deep breath before continuing. “Because I love you.”

I leaned down to kiss him, my heart pounding. “I love you too.”

He chuckled. “I wasn’t sure if you’d say it back.”

Unable to help myself, I rolled my eyes again, grinning at him. “Albus Percival Wulfric BRIAN Dumbledore, I’ve loved you since the first day I met you, you thick prat.”

“Oh,” he said bemused. “Well how was I supposed to know that?”

 

“I keep telling you that you need to get better at reading minds.”

“I’ll work on that,” he said, eyes twinkling. “We told Ari we’d go to the lake today. And it looks late. She’ll leave without us if we don’t get up.”

I groaned dramatically, but rolled off the bed. We prepared for the day quietly, but every once and awhile I’d catch Albus looking over at me and smiling. I’m sure that I was subconsciously doing the same. My lover loved me, and nothing could go wrong today. Of course, as always happens, today was the day that everything would go wrong. The day that I would make an irrevocable decision to continue down the path I had began.

We got Ariana to the lake without much incident. I remember how sweet she looked in that pale blue dress, her dirty blonde hair tangled around her face, making her eyes look even larger than they usually did. She laughed all morning while we watched her play on the shore, amused by things that Albus and I couldn’t see. 

Around noon, Aberforth showed up. His face was redder than I’d ever seen it before, and he smelled as though he’d been out with the goats all day.

“Albus, I need a word,” he said gruffly. “Alone.”

“Anything you want to say to me you can say in front of Gellert,” Albus said mildly.

Aberforth shot me a glare that I eagerly returned, before turning back to his brother. “I heard you talking this morning. You can’t go gallivanting around the world with your mentally ill, dangerous little sister. You just can’t,” he said, a hint of pleading in his tone. “She isn’t strong enough. She can’t be left alone for more than a few minutes without going into one of her rages. Ariana will die if you don’t take care of her. Or she’ll hurt someone else. I’m going back to school soon. I can’t be here to look after her for you while you run off with your lovers. And who will take care of her? HIM?”

Aberforth looked me over and scoffed making my blood boil. He continued, “You want to save the world but you can’t let her suffer because of that. Ariana is in your care, Al, she needs to come first.”

“Ariana will be fine, Aberforth, I promise,” Albus began, “We just want to-”

“You stupid boy,” I spat, too furious to care what I said, “Don’t you realize what we’re trying to do? We’re trying to create a world where people like Ariana don’t have to hide. We want her to be free, don’t you see? Your brother has bigger dreams than just one person. He wants to let EVERY Ariana have a free life, a place outside of St. Mungo’s where they can be happy and go to the lake. And you, you’re just too much of an idiot to understand that. You can’t see beyond yourself and your tiny little world.”

He reached for his wand, fire in his eyes, but I was too quick for him. Before I knew what I was doing, I cast the cruciatus curse on my best friend’s brother. His scream was music to my ears; a kind of bloodlust that I had only experienced before in that muggle village set in. I didn’t want to stop. Albus was calling my name, begging for me to stop and to leave my brother alone. Before I knew it, he was trying to stun me to get me off of his brother.

Aberforth and I began to duel in earnest then, sending terrible curses at one another, with the only intention being to cause pain. Albus tried to stop us, but ended up being dragged into the duel himself, calling out for both of us to regain ourselves, but it was no use. I think the flashes of light must have caught little Ariana’s attention, because she ran over, and was begging us to stop too.

“Gellert, Gel, stop, remember, if you hurt someone on purpose it counts. You’re not a bad person, you’re not a bad person, please!”

 

I can hear her little voice in my head to this day. I wish I would have listened to her. I wonder what would have happened if I had her and Albus by my side to curb my temper, to stop me from reacting too rashly, to help me create real change, not terror. But the world will never know, because I cast a killing curse intended for Aberforth that hit her instead.

She looked so peaceful, so calm, like she was sleeping. It took a moment for any of us to realize what had truly happened. But as the storm of spells ceased, we all knew something was wrong. Aberforth knelt at her side, throwing his wand away from him. He was shaking her, then holding her, then crying over her tiny body. Albus stared at me as if truly seeing me for the first time, his face full of shock and betrayal. 

“Al-Albus, I didn’t mean-”

“I killed her,” he whispered to himself.

“No, you didn’t, I, oh Merlin, I cast the spell, Albus-”

“I killed her,” he said again. He sounded numb, and didn’t seem to be able to tear his eyes away from my face.

“No, it wasn’t you, it was-”

“Get out,” he said, his voice coldly calm. “Get out now.”

“Albus, please,” I begged, my voice full of tears, “I loved Arian-”

 

The love of my life pointed a wand at me for a moment, his hand shaking. Then he let out a gut-wrenching sob and lowered it, sinking to his knees beside his brother and sister, finally letting his grief overcome him. And I ran. I ran like a coward deserting his battalion, saving his own skin and his own sanity rather than staying to fix the damage he’d done. I had never hated myself more than I did in that moment, cursing my selfishness. To make up for it, I promised myself to throw all of my energy into my plans, to reintegrate the magic and muggle worlds, so that never again could someone like Ariana be locked away in a mental institution for being special.

When I lost Albus, I lost the last trickle of goodness my soul had ever contained. I wreaked havoc on the world and killed more than even the one who calls himself Voldemort. I made my old best friend and lover force me out of power, and into the prison I built myself. In my old age, with all my regrets laid out so clearly before me, I would give anything for one last minute with him. But because he, rightfully, would never allow it, I instead leave this. 

I know it doesn’t undo the damage that I did, Albus. But I will forever love you and regret it all. Ariana rests in some heavenly sphere, if there is one, so I’ll surely never see her again. But I loved her too. And when you make it there, tell her I’m so sorry. Tell her that she taught me every good lesson I ever learned. And tell Aberforth that he was right. And to you, my dear friend, who I only knew a few short months. You were the love of my life, the one spark of hope for redemption I ever saw. You will always be my greatest good.


End file.
